Hello All. This week, made 33 years since I met my ex-husband on a date with his best friend. Well, let me start at the beginning.

Picture it. July 1989. I had just turned 16, and through a network of friends spread throughout Baltimore City and County, I had numerous acquaintances I had never met or met only once. This was before the days of social media and the internet, so you spent your life talking not only to your friends on the phone but to their friends in the room. And that is where I met George (not his real name.) George came on the phone once, and our connection was immediate. We would talk for hours at the weirdest times, as George and I had crazy parents that seemed to ground us at the slightest thing. We would sometimes go months without speaking, and suddenly, we got to talk for a few days. We even sent each other a letter once, using an old trick we teenagers used in the 80’s. We put our address as both the deliver to address and the return address, and that way, it would get returned for insufficient postage without asking your parents for a stamp.

All these months later, we finally found a time when neither of us was grounded and had our first date, February 24, 1990. George didn’t have his license yet, so he said he, his best friend Ralph, and Ralph’s girlfriend’s mother would be picking me up. When I opened the door that night, two teenage males were there to pick me up. One was handsome, and the other was a bit goofy looking. The goofy-looking one interested himself as George, and I was like, great. However, in the car, I could tell by voice that the handsome one was George. Imagine my relief as we headed to the mall to hang out all night.

Fast forward 8 months later, and I break up with George for another boy at a new school. Typical teenage crap. I am not proud of that, as I broke George’s heart, but it was part of my life’s journey. Almost a year later, life circumstances led me to some hard times, and George and I started to hang out. As did Ralph and me. Ralph began wooing me in a way I had never had before. Shortly after I turned 18, he asked me to move in with him to take me away from some tough times I was experiencing. I agreed and moved in with Ralph during my senior year of high school. Ralph and I were married during my senior year and stayed that way for almost 13 years. During this time, Ralph joined the Army, and we were able to travel to Missouri, Germany, and finally, Oklahoma. When we split, Ralph met the one he was supposed to be with; I was merely a placeholder for him.

There was a long time that led to some bitterness. I gave up all my dreams to be an Army wife and supported him. But as the years went by, I enjoyed my independence and freedom. Sometimes I wish I was with someone and missed just being married. And then one lousy date would relieve me of those feelings. Then I met my wife.

My ex-husband and I are still Facebook friends, and I miss all the goofiness we used to share when we were friends when I was 16 & 17. That doesn’t mean I wish they were back. I am happy for Ralph. He has a wife he has been with longer than we were together, they each have one kid they brought into the relationship and then had 2 together. Ralph appears to have his dream house on a lake, and his wife is a successful insurance agent.

I have moved 6 hours away from the life I knew in Baltimore and live in a town of 800 in the Upper Valley of New Hampshire. I live in a house everyone knows from the family we bought the house from, who lived here for over 70 years. They had 6 kids, and I have met all the boys and 1 of the girls. I live 2 doors from a library, have a fantastic neighbor on one side, no neighbor on the other, and have mountains surrounding me. I work as an Office Manager and have gotten to know many locals. Except for missing my wife, who is away from home with her job waaaaaaay too much, I have the life I had dreamed of. The anniversary of meeting 2 men that forever changed my life doesn’t stick out to me every year. In fact, I usually don’t remember the date until a month or so later. However, for some years, the date just sticks out to me. Not sure about the difference between some years, but this is the first year I remembered on the date. Thank you, George & Ralph; not your real names, but I am sure you will know who you are.