Hello Everyone!!!!

A few weeks back, I received a surprising diagnosis. I have ADHD. I was not even looking for this. I accompanied a good friend to an appointment through a Zoom call with an extremely prestigious Adult ADHD center. While this friend completed the test for the doctor, I took it off to the side. Of all 5 tests administered, they all showed that I am ADHD. So was the friend I accompanied. Funny things, we are two totally different types of ADHD. I was merely there as emotional support for this friend and to make sure they were being honest with themselves. Little did I know, I was the one who was going to face some uncomfortable truths that help explain the puzzle that is me.

Some of the items that really stuck out to me when I was taking the tests were two very surprising things. One question asked if I frequently lose things such as my phone, my keys, and other important items. OMG!!!! I wish I had a dollar for every not only every time someone had to run after me to give me my phone I left at work, a restaurant, or even my own car. I one time visited family and managed to leave my phone in another state!!! The other item that really surprised me is another question that asked if you often miss your mouth while eating. Now, this has always been a family joke: how could someone with a mouth like mine consistently miss their mouth while eating. It is also the reason I try not to buy solid color tops, due to the food stains being so obvious.

‘So who is this Bonnie Plunkett you speak of?’ you may ask, or for those who know, are shouting, “That is Allison Janney from Mom!” During the later years of the show, Bonnie is diagnosed with ADHD after failing her GED test, which she knew all of the answers to but just couldn’t concentrate. As she starts realizing how much her ADHD has affected her life, her friends and family think she is using the diagnosis as an excuse and encourage her to get help. While Bonnie tells her therapist that she cannot take medication as an addict, as he knows she will abuse it, she decides to use CBT or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. As she continues with her therapy, we see why she does certain things, things that she can work through with some techniques, and some are just part of her coping mechanism. At one point, she gets angry, very, very angry. Bonnie wonders what she could have done or become if someone had just noticed this when she was younger. Trevor, her therapist, shows her that due to her childhood, ADHD had been a protector to her and helped shield her from her childhood.

As I looked more and more into ADHD, I knew I did not want to go the drug route. One of the many symptoms of ADHD is hyperfocus. This is where you get so engrossed in an activity that time is irrelevant. I have spent many late-night sessions writing or doing other chores, and I do some of my best work. So, there are things about my ADHD that I love. However, other aspects of it can go. PLEASE!!!

It seems that every time I think of one of my personality “quirks,” it is an ADHD symptom. My anxiety, which I do take medication for, is a byproduct of ADHD. My oversensitivity is an ADHD symptom. Although this is one I would LOVE to allow to die, it does allow me to feel emotions on a much deeper level than non-ADHD people, which, although is a curse, helps me with my writing.

I was able to find an article recently about creative minds and ADHD. There are books on seeing ADHD as a gift, and many musicians, actors, and others in the creative field have come to terms with ADHD but have made it work for them. Michael Phelps, Jim Carrey, Simone Biles, Will.i.am, Terry Bradshaw, Paris Hilton, Adam Levine, and Howie Mandel are just a few of the creative minds that have made ADHD work for them. It has also been suggested that the likes of Leonardo da Vinci, Vincent Van Gogh, and Pablo Picasso may have had ADHD as each display the characteristics.

So, this I will take as neither a curse nor a gift. Like so many things in life, there is good and bad to go along with it. I will take the good and love these parts that make me the person that I am, and I will try to figure out work-around for the items I do not like and hope the CBT works for me.

You down with ADHD? Yah, you know me!!!!!

Until next week, I bid you Adieu!

Hello everyone!!! Thank you for taking the time to read my latest blog. I love writing these and getting feedback as I like to see what thoughts I have in my head that are normal and what are just odd. Not sure which way is better to be honest.

So, this week, I want to talk about batteries and chargers. Most people are batteries. Batteries are what give the world power. These are our engineers, our auto mechanics, our teachers, our construction workers, our office workers, and our CEOs. Batteries allow society to exist. Without them, there would be no grocery stores, no shopping, no televisions to watch, no radio to listen to, no wifWi-Fi or any sort of internet.

Batteries also give us structure. Literally, they build our buildings, our roads, process our food, and try to keep us safe from disease, crime, nature, and even bears. So, what is the job of the charger, you may ask?

Chargers are what give the battery the power they need to get the job done. So what are chargers? Chargers are the singers, the actors, the writers, the dancers, and other creative beings of the world that lets our minds wander. Now, there are plenty of people and fields that lend to both. Look at an interior designer. Even though they are batteries, they allow others space to charge. For the purposes of this blog, I will be speaking more of the full-time chargers.

To be a strong charger you have to give your everything Just watch any episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race, and you can see exactly what I mean. The winners are the ones that showed their vulnerabilities, faced their inner saboteur, and from fighting through all of this, are able to give something that the world can enjoy. Being a charger is fulfilling as well as exhausting. It can be obsessive, where every waking moment is dedicated to the desire inside of you to let this talent or passion out for the masses or maybe just for the small group this will appeal to.

Isn’t it funny that when people suddenly come into insane amounts of money, many go to find fulfillment in the arts? Many children of the wealthy go into things such as singing, acting, DJing, all in an attempt to get this inner voice out. Many of us start as batteries in our adult life, looking to one day retire and be able to paint, act, sing, or whatever else their hearts desires. There is not only a need to be distracted by the harsh realities of life, but there is a desire in many of us to be able to use creative pursuits as an almost mental island oasis.

As a writer, I know I get the best out of my writing if I only have a basic idea of where I want things to go. From the fourth grade, I have been writing creatively for myself. Unfortunately, being a temperamental artist, most of my work from earlier years have been destroyed, as I go back on my older work and cringe. Artists have a world where most never see just how wonderful it is. We are always pushing ourselves more and more. For some, it is therapy; for others, it brings madness. So why do we do this? Damn, if I know. Seriously it isn’t something big and philosophical. All I know is it is something inspiring, I love to read others’s words inspire me to do the same thing. I don’t know why I desire writing over other pursuits such as singing. Okay, scratch that. I am lying. I don’t sing cause I couldn’t carry a tune with the help of 2 moving men and a fleet of UHaul trucks. However, even if I could sing, writing is where the passion lies.

As a fiction writer, the possibilities of what I can write can endless. To the point of being a writer for hire. You want nighttime a night time story for your kid? Want to leave a scathing review for horrible service or want to thank and reward excellent service? I am your person. Want to write a letter telling your child’s teacher how they would benefit if they could just be a little more patient with your child’s tiny bladder? I can help! Just because I am a charger doesn’t mean I can’t do some work of a battery. Just look at Hedy Lamarr. Not only was she a film star during the Golden Age of Hollywood, but her work is what has made Wi-Fi possible. Lamarr was not just a pretty face.

The need for the chargers of the world to keep the batteries going is why programs in schools, such as music, writing, and acting, are so important. In middle and high schools, conformity is a powerful tool. It is an age that most do not want to stand out. That is why schools need to keep encouraging these programs because interests increase critical thinking skills, and batteries can also be charged. It is interests and hobbies that help the batteries fight to make the world a better place.

Hello Everyone!!!! I hope this blog finds you well. I woke up to another beautiful New England morning. Here it is, August 6th, in Baltimore, when you officially give up trying to look “Hot” and just realize you look hooooooot. The humidity this time of year, courtesy of the Chesapeake Bay, gives August a new level of ick! Yet here I sit in my office, no AC needed as it is only 70 degrees. It is a wonderful day!

My wife works about a six-hour drive from our house, so we spend a LOT of time apart. Good thing I love doing solitary endeavors like writing, or this would drive me NUTS!!! Additionally, I was married previously to a soldier who did tours in Iraq and Bosnia during the course of our marriage, and while in Germany would go away for field maneuvers for 4 weeks every 3 months, so living away from my partner has never been an issue for me. Again, I think I was created for this lifestyle as I spent so many of my growing years with my nose in a book.

Please forgive my tangent. I swear I am leading somewhere, and thank you for coming along with me while I take the scenic route. So, anywho, one of my and my wife’s favorite thing to do is to talk first thing in the morning. During the week, it is a 10-minute conversation as she is about to leave for work, and for me, it is my good morning wake-up call. On weekends, it tends to be a longer conversation, and the places our conversations go is amazing. This is one of those mornings where the conversation took us to wonderful places.

We started talking about the three cats I came into our relationship with, two of which passed on. My wife asked if our current house was the favorite place those three cats lived due to the space. So I started going down the list of cats I have adopted and the different places that were their favorites. As conversations often do, I allowed one topic to easily flow into another. Sometimes that works; other times it leaves people wondering, WTF is she talking about?!?!?!?!?! This time, it worked.

I started talking about how I was different in each of the places I had lived after my divorce and where I was working at the time. I had a job working for a construction company for ten years and left that job shortly after meeting my wife. Our conversation went to how I was asked out by a few of the guys that worked there and by the owner telling me that he was gonna find the right man for me to get me to change back to the “Dark Side.” Now, as a woman who was around Army guys and hung out with a ton of male friends, I have always been the kind that doesn’t mind typical guy talk. However, I never in a million years thought that I would have to deal with being asked out. I was not in the best place mentally at the time, so thinking that would happen had never been farther from my mind. However, one day a worker came into my office, asking for a friend if I dated guys that weren’t white. I told him that he had asked the wrong question. When he looked at me questionably, I told him, “You should have asked if I dated guys. That answer is no.” I could tell I had shocked him, and he just kind of scampered away.

As I was talking to my wife this morning, I realized how lucky I was that I had an easy out such as this for being asked out. Then I started thinking of it more. This was not a gentleman I would have dated even if I was straight. This person had some personal habits that I found incompatible with someone I would date. As I started turning this in my mind, I began to get a bit more animated.

I am gonna put this out there for everyone, male or female, straight, gay, or however else you identify yourself, do not ask anyone out that you work with. Let’s think about this.

Let’s look at an example. I will go old school and look at two people named Dick and Jane. Dick and Jane work for the same big company, on the same floor, in different departments. Jane finds Dick attractive and starts flirting with him. For whatever reason, Dick isn’t interested. Doesn’t matter why he isn’t interested, he just isn’t. Although Dick may feel some flattery, he is not interested. Jane understands and doesn’t pursue further. Now, because this was squashed so easily, no one needed to get HR involved. So this is the perfect scenario, correct? Well, let’s call this the best-case scenario. What this leaves is an uncomfortableness whenever Dick and Jane are alone, whether it is in a breakroom, in a conference room, or just happen to be the two first or last people in the office. This now creates an environment where everything is under a microscope. Dick has an issue with some of the work that Jane is doing? You are just trying to get rid of her because she asked you out. Jane may even feel as if she is being targeted by Dick simply because she asked him. Jane now risks that every person that works at the workplace now asking her to go out. Even in the best-case scenarios, certainly there is still so much potential for disastrous effects.

“But that’s how my _____________ met,” you may say. Well, good for them. Eventually someone wins the mega millions, no matter the odds. Especially if you say that is how your parents or grandparents met, this is no longer a valid excuse. In your parents and grandparents time, there wasn’t internet or if you are young enough that your parents did have this avenue, it was a pretty weird place in the 90’s to early 2000. Now we have much safer, better options. And let’s face it. If you are meant to be with the person you work with, you will find each other in other spots such as on an online dating spot. Then, you are still in danger. No matter how great the beginnings are, always know that if the relationship ends, you may also have to end your employment. Breakups can go from one extreme to another. If it is a pleasant, mutual breakup, you will still have to deal with not only the rumor mill, but also with invasive questions. If it is an emotionally devastating breakup, is it a smart mental move to torture yourself everyday with having to act normal around something so painful?

As we become a bit more enlightened with how things affect different people thanks to social media such as Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook, it also gives us the responsibility to look at things from different perspectives. Now, if you constantly worry about offending people, you will offend people more. If not worrying about how people will take your comments, No matter where your intentions may lie, they will only hear how it is said.

My cat has now come and laid on my arm so I must bid you all farewell. And Adley says purrrrrpurrrrrrrpurrrr

Hello All, and Happy Sunday!

First off, let me start by saying I am a bad blogger! Shame on me. I promised last Sunday that there would be a one-day delay, yet there was a week-long delay. For those of you that look forward to my blog, I thank you, and I am sorry. Something threw me off my game last week, and the more I followed up, the more I learned, but then there was another event….. This is why I am a writer, not a Reader’s Digest editor. It is not in my makeup to do short and precise.

Two weeks ago, I wrote a blog about going to a couple of outdoor markets and gave out business cards and some of my blogs, and I gave a shout-out to all the small businesses I met. I was thrilled with being able to give back to others due to my feeling of an outpouring of love and support for my writing. However, on what is my most controversial blog, I got 3 nasty comments, all variations of asking me to procreate with myself. Even weirder to me was that 8 people chose an angry emoji. That was out of 158 reactions, but how could giving a shout-out irk 11 different people to react as they did. I was beginning to question if I understood people and what they were looking for in a writer. I have struggled with self-esteem in every area of my life, so I didn’t believe this, but I was perplexed.

Then I remembered an incident online from two weeks earlier. A “constitutional auditor” made a video at the town hall about 5 doors from my house. As many of you know from previous blogs, I come from not just a big city but from an extremely corrupt police force big city, Baltimore City. I grew up in 21206 in Hamilton, adjacent Raspeburg. Anyone from Baltimore will get those references. Homicide, The Wire, and We Own This City are all about the issues in Baltimore City. Out of the last 4 mayors, one was caught stealing gift cards for the homeless and poor, the next threw herself a $350K going away party, and the next was indicted and sentenced to three years in federal prison. So, I know bad town politics and bad cops.

I was quite perplexed by it until I thought there might be a connection between my comment and people trying to sabotage my writing. I took all of this knowledge and put it on a back burner in my brain to let it simmer. Then on Tuesday, I received the news I had been waiting for. I had been accepted into the MFA program I had wanted the most!!! In fact, they sent me an acceptance two months before they usually made announcements due to the quality and potential they saw in my writing. So, at this point, I am optimistic that the reason for negative reactions can only be the fans of the auditor. And probably, most people would have let it go. But not me. Oh no, I had to verify this fact. And of the 11 negative reactions and comments, three are from constitutional audit fans. What shocked me was all of the older people from the profile pics that were angry. Then I saw what it was. It was because I mentioned I went to the one fair with my wife. It is 2023, and some still hate my writing because I am gay. First of all, there is no need for them to comment or react. Block me. Please.

I do apologize for being a bit crass. Still, I can’t see any other way to say it so simply yet so powerfully that even those who are small-minded enough to judge me purely on my attractions can understand how it makes no sense.

Hello All,

Please, let me apologize for the lack of a blog last week. I have gone to events the last two weekends meeting with other creative minded people and feeling a full re-energization taking place. As I have talked about in an earlier blog, finding your tribe is essential!

Last weekend, my wife and I went to French Day in Cape Vincent, NY at the 1000 Islands. I had a blast. As we were leaving my wife’s work apartment where she stays during the week, I grabbed a stack of my newly minted business cards. I only bought them because as people would talk to me, they would ask for my website or Facebook handle, so I was always writing them down and I do not have the best writing. I purchased some simple cards along with a bag and some pens from one of those quick cheap internet personalization stores. They turned out great. So off I went, not quite sure what I was going to do with the business cards.

First off, this festival is HUGE!!!!!! We had to take a yellow school bus from the parking lot to the festival. And as a 50-year-old married to a 49-year-old on a sweltering day, we were taking that bus! Once there, we started walking around and checking out the booths. I found one booth that was not the best find for me. It had fudge made with 30% less sugar. I had bariatric surgery 6 years ago and cannot eat sugary sweets unless in exceedingly small quantities. There fudge I was able to eat. I grew up only an hour and a half from Hershey Park so being able to eat fudge is a right I have had since I was a baby. In fact, a little side story here. When I was 2, my parents took me to Kings Dominion for their first year open. I have adorable pictures of me with Hong Kong Phooey, Huckleberry Hound, and of course Yogi Bear. When you enter the main gates, there is a fountain in the center with shops on both sides. While my parents were shopping in a candy store, I took a tray of fudge from behind the counter(I had easy access in my stroller) and set it on my stroller. As my mother was wheeling me out, I was chowing down with a hunk of fudge in each hand. What can I say, I knew what I liked, lol. Although, I feel I may have been set up by my dad. I mean, I am such an angel, I cannot even fathom this. Okay, before I am struck down, let me continue.

I gave the vendor my card and started talking about both my blog and some writing I have in process currently. As we continued, I met an author by the name of Cassidy Thomas. She was a young, almost timid woman with her books she has self-published. I asked her which book she would recommend to me as an older person reading her for the first time and she recommended her book Waves Under the Ocean which chronicles senior year of high school using the views of 8 different friends during the 1992-93 school year. It is like kismet as I graduated in 1992, I knew I would be able to see myself in her book. She published her first book at 20 which she had begun writing at 15. Although I by no means hold any ill will towards my parents, I wonder how much sooner I could have started on this journey if I had just had this type of encouragement. I smell another blog topic. Hold on while I write it down…… Okay, thanks for holding on. All done. Miss Thomas asked if I had anything published so I gave her my card and told her about my WIP (work in process for you unindoctrinated).

While we continued walking, I came across a children’s author that was amazing. He not only authored books for babies up to preteens, but he also took old stuffed animals and created new out of them. It is hard to describe but the animals were both new yet had that super soft already loved feel. He had several books on The Wizard of Oz, and I bought the preteen novel The Wizard of Oz: Where is He Now? This book has beautiful illustrations and an easily read story about the adventures of The Wizard and an undersized munchkin named Rosebud. When I handed him my business card, he asked if I had any writing of mine for him to see, and again, I referred him to my website on the cards.

As we were waiting for the bus to take us back to the car later, my wife told me how much she enjoyed watching me hustle and how I was more at ease talking to strangers about my writing than I seemed to be in any other aspect of my life. These words stuck with me when I left the next morning to return to New Hampshire. And then I saw the sign I had been looking for. About 3 miles from my house, there was a craft/farmers/flea market at the local senior center. There were about 25 tables and I stopped and talked to everyone. But this time, I took a packet of 10 of my blogs and handed them out. I handed out 13 total yesterday and even heard people talking about how they now had something to distract them from the intense heat. Okay, it may have only been 88 but when this temp only hits about once or twice a year, it feels like 103 felt in Baltimore. We were all melting. But none of them are personality-wise. I met older artists that made beautiful objects with resin, two different artists whose original art is displayed on cards and framed pictures, a Tupperware husband and wife team, a preteen that not only made homemade lollipops, she could talk and educate like any other entrepreneur, and a jewelry artists that is making the most fun, original earrings I have ever seen.

I hope by going out and meeting possible fans of my work, they get to see my passion, as I see theirs. I want to thank everyone I met and got to talk to over the last two weekends. As a writer, I am a student of the human condition. I watch how people interact with each other and love to hear all about them to help make my characters feel more genuine, which comes from excellent backstories.

I am including the list of the people I met over the last two weekends. Please support these local artists if at all possible!!!!! Our dreams are in your hands.

As Cassidy Thomas states “Hugs and Apple Pies.” EGA

1. Cassidy Thomas-Author amazon.com/author/cassidyt or Cassidytauthor.weebly.com
2. Richard Mickelson-Author Richiebearsemporium.com
3. Naia’s Sweets N Treets- Shelf Stable gourmet lollipops
4. Ray and Evelyn Richer-Wildlife and Nature Photography rloonnest@gmail.com
5. Dangles by Deb-Earrings and fun jewelry dangles-by-deb.com
6. Nickole Varny-Tupperware my.tupperware.com/nickcolevarney
7. Lee’s Creative Creations-Furniture restoration, Paint Pours, Epoxy Gifts lee_loyer@yahoo.com
8. Wind Dancer Creations-Quits and Fabric Items sjtapage@gmail.com
9. Quilts in the Kitchen-Krtayl@worldpath.net

Hello All!!! I thought I would do something different this week and tell you about the first post comment I received on my blog last week. To refresh your memory, it was which is better: Mid-Atlantic or New England. One is my hometown, and one is my adoptive hometown. This was a lighter blog I thought was very needed after the multi-part series on grief.

This comment was followed by a meme of a dog pooping with wording similar to “Here is your crap back” or something else unoriginal. I promised myself when I started this blog that I would not take down comments just because I disagreed with them. I am also a Women’s Author, meaning I am writing to an audience of women 30+ years old as my primary audience but I love when others outside of the demographic also read and enjoy. This comment was made by a male and, in alpha male stereotypical fashion, shit on the blog, figuratively and as much as possible literally, but gave no offer of improvement or even what he is calling garbage. So, let’s look at the possibilities:

1. He doesn’t like my website-Yeah, I feel ya there. I only got a website as a project for school, and now that I see the benefits and try to self-promote, it has become a valuable tool. However, I am not using the most user-friendly website, but it is the top-rated one for bloggers. So, WordPress, some days you don’t like me, and some days I don’t like you. However, I am in the last semester of my undergrad degree, and once this is complete, I am looking into online instruction or even webinars to make this page much more user-friendly. Hell, I even tried to forward a blog, and I couldn’t find it easily.
2. He doesn’t like my page-Hey, no problem there. I curate my content for my target audience, and he is the wrong gender and age group to be a part of this. However, I dismiss this as he is a follower on my FB page, and no one has to force anyone’s arm into that, so I doubt this is the reason
3. He didn’t like my conclusions-Okay. I had Mid-Atlantic taking out a victory but just barely. I know a lot of people love the Patriots and Maine lobsters, but a bushel of steamed crabs, along with watching the Baltimore Ravens, is an experience like no other. And until the Patriots have a rivalry like Ravens/Steelers, they will not be as much fun of a team to watch, follow, and root for.
4. He is a sexist ass that hates to see women achieve-No. I think this is the one farthest from the possible truth. However, please see 5. below.
5. He is a man comfortable in his world and can’t handle a female showing him the real world-This I would believe more if this hadn’t been written as a fun blog. There was nothing to be taken seriously in this blog. However, I try not to shy away from issues that affect women, so it is possible that he didn’t feel comfortable spilling his hate on a serious piece and decided to wait until something with a bit more fluff came out
6. He is a troll-I saved the most likely for last. He could just be a troll that has no talents of his own, so spends his days in such misery from lack of stimulation that he has no choice but to lash out at those who have a talent and a passion. Now I am not saying I am the greatest writer ever, and at 50, I am getting a very late start on dream fulfillment, but the difference is I am chasing it, not just shitting on the people brave enough to try.

Now, there could be other reasons, but by putting only the word Garbage and the meme, he leaves me with no other option than to think it is one of the reasons above. If you don’t like my vernacular, my conversational tone, my opinions, let me know. I am always looking for some constructive suggestions. I never use constructive criticism because as a GenX kid, every masochist teacher loved to call it constructive criticism and just basically take all ambition and joy out of everything. So yes, I love feedback. But if all you can spare of your energy or brain is a one-word unhelpful comment, please utilize the energy to unfollow me. I have readers that look forward to my blogs and that is my audience. So if you are reading and enjoying this and my other blogs, thank you! This is a dream come true. Everything I am currently doing is to one day be a financial success and hopefully my wife and I will be able to live off what I make through my writing, but that is a ways off yet. So, as I hone my craft, thank you! Thank you for the love, thank you for the patience as I learn, and thank you for just sparing a few moments to help this person’s dream come true!

I truly can not express the gratitude I owe each of you!

Jessie

Hello, my minions! I hope everyone has had a fabulous week!!! I sure did! This new life of retirement is pretty awesome and spectacular. Wish I had done it sooner!

One thing that is making this transition so much easier is that I have activities to keep me motivated and moving on toward the next day. I have so much time to ponder life’s questions, such as “Which is better, Mid-Atlantic or New England?” As I have told you previously, I am from Baltimore, MD originally, and I moved to New Hampshire because my spouse and I fell in love with the state when work moved her to Dover, NH. We decided to just find the house, check out the neighborhood, and basically, our only border was trying to keep it in New Hampshire; although there was a time I really wanted to move to Bangor, ME but the last thing I wanted to do as a new writer was to always be in the shadow of the town’s more famous writer. I mean, the last thing a new author wants to do is live in a shadow as great as that of Stephen King. And frankly, his shadows scare me, lol.

As I go about my daily life without the stresses of work, I have plenty of time to ponder, and I have come up with one burning question: Which is better, Mid-Atlantic or New England?

1. Well, let us start with some obvious items. New England has beautiful foliage. OMG, it is impressive. It turns surrounding areas around very busy with traffic, but I can’t blame them. This area is so beautiful and breathtaking. It makes me wish I had the talent in painting that I have in writing so I could paint some of the beautiful sites around me. When I first arrived, I filled my phone with the most beautiful pictures. What I learned, though, is pictures never do it justice. It may be enough to impress those who have never seen the beauty firsthand, but it does nothing to show the true beauty. And it isn’t just in the fall. Even just driving to run simple errands, I am treated to the beauty around me. And it doesn’t matter the season. Even the coldest, dreariest winter day still looks beautiful up here. This is what is called “God’s Country,” as so much is still unspoiled by man. I have the Appalachian Trail about 10 minutes from my house, and within an hour is the White Mountain Forest. I live in what is called the Upper Valley, which is surrounded by mountains. It is incredible to know that no matter what window I look out of in town, I see mountains. By contrast, my last home in Baltimore was in an area called “Hampden.” Hampden is known as a hipster paradise, and I lived right off of the area known as “The Avenue.” On this avenue, there are second-hand stores, restaurants, and ice cream shops, to name a few. There is one restaurant I took some friends to that did dinner through science and came up with all kinds of interesting food combinations that normally I wouldn’t try, but I did enjoy the crab foam on the deviled eggs made with bacon fat. In addition, there used to be a pretty famous restaurant named “Cafe Hon” that was on an episode of Kitchen Nightmares. If you ever want to see how to become completely hated in a town, find this episode. It is season 4, episode 15. I lived right behind this restaurant during filming, and I saw the trailer at the end of a street. Although it was non-descript, having things filmed in Baltimore is a regular occurrence, especially in Hampden, home to John Waters. Additionally, in Hampden, there are a bunch of street festivals, which, if you like those things, is awesome! If you are like me, it was loud, lol. However, what Baltimoron can resist HunFest? The day that you wear your biggest beehive hairdo and you call everyone Hun. It is the best of Baltimore’s heritage and so much fun. So, let’s call the winner of unique things would be New England.
2. Let’s talk sports!!!
   • Red Sox vs. the Orioles. I would love to have my niece weigh in on this. She is the Orioles guru, along with my brother. When I texted her, here is what “E,” told me:

“The Orioles have a way better future ahead. They have the #1 minor league system. Meaning they have the best prospects waiting for them ahead. The Red Sox have only two players on the top 100 prospect list (the Orioles have 8.) The Orioles are playing way better than the Red Sox are currently. The Orioles are in second place in their division, whereas the Red Sox are in fifth place in that same division.”

Ravens vs. Patriots-Yes, the Patriots have won 6 Super Bowl championships since the Ravens became a team in 1996. However, this is all on the back of one man. He may be a GOAT, but that does not make for a better team. Just a crippled team anytime their star player gets injured. Now, let’s look at the power rankings list of the most successful teams of the Super Bowl era. Now this is funny. Ravens are #10 on the list, and the Patriots are #11. But this ranking isn’t entirely fair. The Patriots were the powerhouse of the first two decades of the new millennium. If you take away Tom Brady, then their numbers plummet even more. Both have awesome fan bases, but there is something about tailgating outside the Raven’s Stadium, also known as M&T Bank Stadium. There is even a film with the line “Crab Cakes and Football. That’s what Maryland does.” So, with both areas having solid teams and even stronger fan bases, I must say that Baltimore eeks out a victory!

3. Food. Okay, this will be tough. I will start with the delicacies I have been introduced to here. First and foremost, up in New England, you can get ANYTHING, and I mean ANYTHING, maple-flavored. Beer, wine, popcorn, cotton candy, candy, edibles, you name it, there is a maple-flavored item. My favorite is a habanero maple seasoning that I put on my steaks. Nothing like the sweet/hot flavor. I also moved up here thinking I did not like lobster. Well, come to find out, I love lobster. Just not the chum that gets sent down to Baltimore. I was also introduced to whole belly clams. Now, moving here, I wasn’t a big clam fan. I mean, it is chewy, tasteless, and is mostly breading. In Baltimore, it is more a filler on a seafood platter or a kids’ meal in a seafood restaurant. But in New England, holy cow. They are so good. They have a slight tang, like Mid-Atlantic oysters; however, they hold up so much better to frying. It is becoming one of my favorite seafood dishes. In addition, I now only eat freshly butchered meats from the local slaughterhouse, where I worked as an office manager until my retirement. I eat eggs from a local farmer. Due to the lack of restaurants, I eat mostly what I cook, and it is amazing how my taste buds have woken up. But there are a few things that I miss about the Mid-Atlantic grocery. One weird thing is New England has more brown eggs than white eggs. I can’t tell the difference, so that is just an odd sidenote. However, cheese is the one thing that is a different color and has a different taste. But a particular cheese. Cheddar. Most cheddar cheese in New England is white in blocks and individually packed sticks. I love cheese and go through a minimum of 6 cheese sticks of extra sharp cheddar daily! Although the white is good, there is something different about the yellow cheese. I miss it, and trying to stock it up when I am in town just doesn’t work. New England also has a brand of potato chips called Humpty Dumpty which reminds me of Herr’s chips, although made in PA, so slightly out of the Mid-Atlantic area. One of the most popular favors of Humpty Dumpty chips is called “All Dressed,” which is a combo of bbq, ketchup, and salt and vinegar. One last item is New England really does have the best hot dog buns. They are quickly grilled with a bit of butter and are just phenomenal. However, let’s get real. Mid-Atlantic has so much more!!!! Let’s not forget that Maryland is home to McCormick spices. OLD BAY. Nothing more is said here. Steamed Blue Crabs. Berger cookies ft shortbread cookies covered on top with chocolate fudge. So freaking good. Baltimore is also the home of Royal Farms chicken. It is the best chicken, and it is at convenience stores. In fact, just a quick check around the web of multiple rankings, Royal Farm Chicken is in the top three of every list I checked. Mid Atlantic also has Pit Beef, as described below:

“

Pit beef is served in many restaurants, bars, and pubs in the Charm City area, and surprisingly, it is rarely found outside Maryland. It is essentially a juicy roast beef sandwich cooked on a grill. All manner of grills are used, charcoal, wood, and gas.

The meat is a large hunk of beef, often from the rump, often top round, sometimes bottom round, and sometimes sirloin. It is rubbed with a savory spice and herb mix, usually cooked until it is dark and crispy on the outside and rare inside, sliced thin across the grain so there is a narrow crusty ring of flavor from the exterior in every bite. Then it is heaped on a roll of rye bread. You can usually order your preferred doneness since the edges and tapered sections are cooked more and are less red. Cooks will often throw slices back on the fire if you don’t want yours rare.”

That is how good pit beef is. I couldn’t describe it, so I went to a website, and now I have to put a citation. I hope everyone understands that one of the reasons I am a fiction author is that I despise making citations. So, you are welcome. Don’t forget raw onions, bbq sauce, tiger sauce, and horseradish on your sandwich. I prefer mine on a Kaiser roll with extra bbq sauce. We, of course, have tons of seafood. The steamed crabs like previously mentioned, tons of different kinds of oysters, crab cakes, crab soup, cream of crab soup, crab balls, soft shell crabs, scallops, shrimp, shrimp cheesesteaks, shrimp salad, scallops, mussels, all either fried or broiled. We have rockfish, shoo-fly pie, and Smith Island cake; you are in a food paradise in this area. So even with the lobsters and maple, New England food has nothing on Mid-Atlantic.

So although it seems like Mid-Atlantic squeaked out a victory, where I am from is not the way it once was. Now I am on high alert to walk down streets in my hometown in daylight that I used to hang out in at night with no adults in sight. I remember leaving the Jr Prom to go to the Inner Harbor. At night. On a Friday!!!!! I would never do that now. So, what can I say as I bring a bit of Mid-Atlantic to New England and when I visit a little New England to the Mid-Atlantic in the end? I am an East Coast girl; I am hip and have style you would really dig. Or at least I did 35 years ago!

Until Next Time…….

Coppieters, Kris. “Authentic Pit Roast Beef Done Right in Your Own Backyard.” Meathead’s AmazingRibs.com, Nov. 2022, amazingribs.com/tested-recipes/beef-and-bison-recipes/amped-roast-beef-cheap-baltimore-pit-beef-recipe.

Recently, while watching something on TV, I wish I remembered what show it was; they were talking about Father’s Day. So Father’s Day is the 20th most popular holiday in the US. The top spot is Christmas, second spot Mother’s Day. The person telling this asked if anyone knew of 20 holidays. Then he asked if anyone knew what Arbor Day is because it is ranked 13. Halloween was #3. So ghosts and goblins get more respect than fathers. While that is true in some cases, not in all. So here to the dads! And I have included:

1. The perfect dads
2. The not-so-perfect dads that try
3. The dads that live far away but always are there when the kids need them
4. The dads that did their family the service of leaving them so they could repair themselves
5. The dads knew they were flawed human beings but did their best anyway
6. The dads that get up every day to a job they hate to give their kids a good life
7. The dads that have kids they don’t even know about
8. The dads who had pregnancies end and never got to meet their children
9. The dads who have chronically sick kids and miss a ton of sleep for
10. The dads that have demons that caused them to be bad parents but they fix themselves, as it is never too late
11. The dads that try to fix themselves but fall again and again
12. The dads that save their kids from a bad situation, no matter what it is
13. The dads that had to tell children bad news of their mother’s illness or passing
14. The dads that had to tell their children that one of their siblings didn’t make it home
15. The dads that have to watch their children go down the same path they did knowing that it could lead to destruction
16. The dads that never got to hold a child of their own
17. The dads whom were the dad that the neighborhood went to
18. The dads that taught their kids hunting, fishing, sports, or whatever passion they had to pass to their kids
19. The dads that didn’t have to be but loved their step-kids as if they were their own
20. The dads that adopt their step-kids
21. The dads that work well with the step/biological father of the kids in their home
22. The dads that coach teams
23. The dads that let their daughters paint their nails
24. The dads that tell funny jokes
25. The dads that make the best damn chili-This one is for you Dad!
26. The dads that although bald, still try to brush and style their daughter’s hair when mom is not available
27. The dads that always find a way to surprise their kids with a little treat
28. The dads that create traditions such as going for a soda and $1 worth of candy from a candy counter-Another for you Dad!
29. The dads that let us have things that mom wouldn’t let us have
30. The dads that intercede when the daughter gets an unsolicited cat call or obscene gesture
31. The dads that sit with their daughters and talk with them
32. The dads that let their kids know that their potential is limitless
33. The dads that died before their child was born
34. The dads that talk to their kids even after they have passed
35. The dads that instilled pride in their kids
36. The dads whose kids are furbabies-This is for you, Honey!
37. The dads whose kids go down the wrong path but they still love them
38. The dads that were drop-outs yet their kids get a full scholarship to an ivy league school
39. The dads that take screaming kids out of restaurants to give them a time-out in the van
40. The dads that have had to prepare funeral arrangements for their kids
41. The dads that sit and help their wives through fertility treatments
42. The dads that make sacrifices so that their kids can have the best life
43. The dads who are rocking on their rocking chairs, shooting the bull with other old-timers
44. The dads that have multiple kids but still manage to have special alone time with each
45. The dads that were called the Cool Dad by all the kids in the neighborhood but their own
46. The dads that found a piece of their childhood back when they played games with their kids
47. The dads that weren’t as hands-on as their kids would have liked, but managed to still do all the specific things the child asks
48. The dads that show their daughters strength and their sons respect
49. The dads that go hungry while they make sure their kids eat
50. The dads that make us, whether traditionally, in a lab, or by whatever means. We are here because of you!!! For some of you, this is a day of appreciation. And for some, it is a day of shame. Whatever is the badge you have earned, WEAR IT! If you don’t like the badge, change it. If your child was conceived through violence, do the one thing in your life that makes you redeemable. Stay out of their life. This is the only fathers I say this to. If you are dealing with addictions, get help. Not for the kids, but because you want to be a role model for them.

Not all of us are granted with a great father. Some don’t learn the skills until much older, some never do, some gives glimpses of greatness that can be even more painful because we get a glimpse of the dad we should have. So on this Father’s Day, thank you to all the dads that try, all the dads that will get there, and all the kids even though they aren’t good at showing it, loved their kids more than the breathe in their bodies.